Little Boxes Made of Ticky Tacky

Thinking lately. My room is complete shambles. I have never been so sad to leave a place. Oakville has been my home for almost 3 years.. and it feels so right. Thanks to friends and my amazing boyfriend for making it the best place I have ever grown in. Since arriving in 2006 as a wee child straight out of high school, so many changes have taken place. Hair cuts, style in clothes, even the people I called my true friends. Back then all that mattered was where I got my clothes from and drinking cause it was the thing to do.. and I was nearly legal (19 mind you) But now, friends matter. Frank matters. Work definitely mattered, as much as the hours were killer. I do enjoy drinking with friends and enjoying their company, but no longer do I do it to get drunk and go crazy. A lot of that did change this year because I was working so much during the first semester of school, and let me tell you.. starting work at 7:30A was not fun with a hangover. I no longer care where I get my clothing from. It used to be all Hollister and Abercrombie. Now, what I like, who cares where it's from, I like it. I've grown up, and still growing. This should be it's own blog post in its own.... oh well. The grocery adventure with Frank today landed me infront of the tabloid magazines. Looking at one magazine, I noticed that the photographers emphasized on women in bikinis that were looking.. well.. like what real women are supossed to look like. Inside I flipped and there they went off saying how people who looked like "that" have let them selves go. It pisses me off. I look into the mirror and see me. I in no way, shap, or form am the perfect female body. Yes, I may say I am thin, been that way my whole life, an I have gained some weight in the past 3 years, probably for the better. But yes, I will look at my thighs and see some cottage cheese texture to them, thinking something is terribly wrong. It is true what they say, the media has such an influence on how women see themselves. No real woman looks airbrushed all the time. Women are supposed to have curves, I find them sexy and healthy looking. I love watching the British show "How to Look Good Naked" always makes me think that maybe I'm not so bad after all. Frank finds me beautiful, that should be enough. I need to put my head into that mindset more often. There is just way too much on my mind right now. Other posts to come later.